19 Apr A love to remember: Gospel to the husband

Ephesians 5:25-30

²⁵ Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, ²⁶ that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, ²⁷ so that he might present the church to himself in splendour, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. ²⁸ In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. ²⁹ For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, ³⁰ because we are members of his body. 

The main text that I chose for the next three weeks is from Ephesians chapter 5. If you grow up in church, then you know that this is the famous husband and wife chapter. And yet many of you are single. Why did I choose this passage? Because this is God’s design for relationship. Single guys, when you begin to pursue that girl, you are on your journey to becoming the husband that loves his wife the way Christ loves his church. You are not just a boyfriend. Single girls, when you decide to take that guy’s hand, you are in the process of submitting your life to him the way the church submits to Christ. You are not just a girlfriend. Dating is not a game. Relationship is not easy. It is hard work. Yet God graciously helps us by giving us the blueprint of how every relationship should look like. And this is my goal for the next few weeks. My hope is that by the end of this series, guys, you are one step closer to become the Christ-like husbands and girls, you are one step closer to be like the true bride of Christ.

Today, I will preach to the men in the house. All the men make some noise. Men, I know you are smart and cool and you think you know everything there is to know about relationship already. I feel you. But for the sake of your wife or future wife, I want to encourage you to pay a very good attention tonight. Because I believe without a shadow of a doubt that all of you want to have a flourishing relationship. None of you ever dream to destroy the love of your life. It just sometimes we are lost and do not know what to do. But it is very hard for guys to admit that we do not know what to do. There is something in us that like to believe that we know it all. So, let me save you some pain. You don’t know. And what the Bible has to say to you tonight can save you years of unnecessary pain in a marriage. So, pay attention.

And for the girls, tonight is very important for you as well. Wives, you need to know what to expect from your husband. Single girls, you need to know what to expect from a man who pursues your hand in a relationship. What I see happening a lot of times is a godly woman who sells herself cheap because she does not know what to expect. Single girls, you must keep the bar high. There is a standard that you should expect and encouraged to see from a man who pursues you. And if the man does not meet the standard, the best thing you can do for him is to say ‘no’. Guys might hate me for saying this but listen to me ladies – there is something about your ‘no’ that can propel a man into maturity. Isn’t that true man? We excel at maturity when we are broken-hearted. It is weird, I know. But it is the truth. So, ladies, the best thing you can do for us is to never lower your standard. Keep the bar high but Biblical. I feel the need to say that because I know there are some girls out there with unreasonable bar. They want a guy that is as good looking as Lee Min Ho, as rich as Mark Zuckerberg, as romantic as Captain Ri, and as spiritual as John Piper. If that is you, you are predestined from before the foundation of the world to be single. That is not the kind of bar that I am talking about ladies. But the Bible does give you a healthy bar in which you will do well to keep.

Let us recap a little from the first part of the series. We learned that male and female are created in the image of God. Our self-worth is not defined by what we do but in whose image we are. We are created with intrinsic value and that is why we do not need to look to other people to tell us our worth. We are created in the image of the most glorious triune God and we are created to reflect that glory to one another. In God’s design for a relationship, we do not ask the question, “How can you serve me?” but, “How can I serve you?” Instead of demanding from one another, we seek to give to one another. We also learned that both male and female have equal dignity before God. Both are the representation of God’s image. However, even though they have equal value, they are different from one another. Male and female are created differently so that together they complement one another. There is harmony, joy, and delight in the relationship as each one plays their unique roles.

Few words about unique roles. There are many things I am going to say in the next few weeks that will challenge your views of the roles of husbands and wives. Some of you might get offended by it. Especially when we are talking about gender role. It can quickly become a very personal issue. We need to understand that the right understanding of Christianity will always challenge our views. Some of you might think that what I will say is too old school, the Eastern mindset. While others might think that what I will say is too progressive, the Western mindset. But Christianity does not fit both Eastern and Western mindset. Christianity is from the above and it will continue to challenge our cultural mindset.

Here is what I know to be true. Men and women are different. We live in a culture that tries to eradicate all differences between men and women. They argue that the only difference between men and women is in our physical make-up. This is not true and research tells us that it is not true. Let me give you a few examples. They researched infant boys and girls. They put an obstacle before these infants and recorded how they deal with it. When the baby boys come up to an obstacle, do you know what they do? They knock them over. When the baby girls get near an obstacle, they walk around it. Isn’t that how men and women deal with problems today? Men like to punch problem in the face while women like to talk and find a way around their problem. Right? Another one. When they turned on jazz music, the heartbeat of 6 months old girls speeds up. While for the boys, nothing happened. What does it mean? Girls like complexity while boys like simplicity. Isn’t that true? One more. Let me read you what Carol Gilligan wrote in her article. Carol is a non-Christian feminist. “My research shows that men see themselves as maturing as they separate. Women see themselves as maturing as they attach. Men, therefore, have the gift of independence. Women have the gift of interdependence.” That means that when husband and wife encounter problems in a relationship, the husband tendency is to think, “I am going to deal with this problem on my own. I am a mature man and I am going to take care of it on my own. I’ve got this.” While the wife thinks, “Can we talk about this problem? Why are you not talking to me about it? Am I not important for you?” Who would have thought? Research is showing what the Bible has told us all along that men and women are different.

Today, we’ll zoom in specifically at God’s design for husbands in a marriage relationship. Let me give you the outline of the message. We will talk about the responsibilities of husbands; Distorted image; And I will give you some applications at the end. Notice that these verses are addressed to the husbands. Husbands, these verses are especially for you. Single men, what Paul says to the husbands is what you should start working and prepare yourself for when you enter a marriage relationship. So, these verses apply to all men. And we get our cue from Jesus. We don’t look to any other relationship gurus out there. We look to Jesus and we learn from Jesus. He is our role model. The way Christ loves his church ought to be a picture of how our relationship looks like with our wives. And ladies, don’t try to play the role of Holy Spirit. If you are watching with your husband, do not elbow or give them the look. And do not say to him, “Babe, what do you think about the sermon? I think the sermon today is really good. I think we should evaluate the way you have loved me.” Don’t do it. Let me do the preaching and let the Holy Spirit do the convicting. Your turn is next week ladies.

Responsibilities of husbands

First, love sacrificially. Ephesians 5:25 – Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. Paul cannot be clearer on this. Husbands, your love for your wife needs to be marked with sacrifice. We know instinctively that a measure of how much you love someone is measured based upon how much you are willing to sacrifice for that person. There is a reason why God created men stronger than women. It is not to dominate women but to protect women. In saying this, I understand there are a few exceptions. A couple of months ago, I started hitting the gym again after a few months of absence. And I was struggling to lift the weight that used to be my routine. Then came this Asian girl standing next to me, lifting the same weight as I did effortlessly. So, I dropped the weight, walked away, and went home in shame. So yes, those girls are exceptions. But, even so, if I am out on a date with that girl and we have a robber with a knife in front of us, I am not going to say to her, “Why don’t you deal with the robber since you are obviously stronger than me.” No. I am going to say to the robber, “Don’t you dare touch her. Over my dead body.” The robber probably knocks me out and then she can deal with him while I am knocked out. The point is she might be ten times stronger than me, but I am not going to let her fight while I am there. After I am knocked out, that’s a different story. But in general, men are created stronger for a reason. And that reason is not to dominate your wives but to love them sacrificially.

Let me give you a few examples on what it means to love your wives sacrificially.

• Be generous with your yes. Listen to this carefully. What do you do when you and your wife can’t agree on the same thing? Let’s say that you want to buy a black car and your wife wants a red car. Which car should you get? Does the husband say, “Babe, remember Ephesians 5:22. Paul says that I am the head so we are getting the black car.” Of course not. Because the wife can say, “Honey, remember verse 25. You are supposed to give yourself for me. How would you die for me if you can’t even let me have the red car?” Husbands, to love your wives sacrificially means to use your authority not to please yourself but to find ways to put your wives’ desires and needs above your own. If she wants to watch 5 episodes of Crash Landing on you and you hated it, say yes to CLOY. If she’s craving for salad but you want KFC, say yes to salad. If she wants to go on holiday to Korea to meet Hyun Bin but you prefer to go to Manchester to watch United play, say yes Korea. If she wants a Hermes bag, you say yes as long as it made in China. #HappyWifeHappyLife. Is that mean that the husbands must always follow their wives? Of course not. Husbands are called to be the head of the family, not wives. There are times that husbands must decide otherwise. Here is the principal. Be generous with your yes and save your ‘no’ for what matters. When you are generous with your yes, then your wives can trust you with your no in making a big decision in life. She understands that there are times that the husband has to say no, not because he wants to dominate her, but because he is the leader of the family. More of this next week. But men, your ‘no’ begins with lots of ‘yes’ so that your wife is secure that you always have her best interest at heart.
• Initiate reconciliation. Now, this is hard. Very hard. If you’ve been in a fight with your spouse, then you know what I’m talking about. Every time there is a fight, both parties are always at fault. Listen, men. The weight of responsibility that caused the fight might lie heavier on one over the other. But the weight of responsibility to reconcile always lie on the husbands. “That’s not fair!” I am not saying it is. Husbands are called to love their wives the way Christ loved the church. In Christ’s relationship with the church, who offended who? And who took the first step to reconcile? Husbands, you need to swallow your pride and love your wives more than your pride.
• Seek to serve rather than to be served. I have issues with men who are willing to get their hands dirty outside the house but do not want to get their hands dirty inside the house. This is the kind of husbands who is willing to walk the extra mile to help their friends but neglect the fact that their wives need help changing the kid’s diaper. Listen, husbands, your wives need you more than your friends need you. Just because you are the head of the family, it doesn’t mean you can do whatever you want. Jesus teaches otherwise. Leaders are called to serve. Husbands, you are called to serve your family, not to be served by your family. Rather than asking the question “what can my wife do for me?”, ask the question, “what can I do for my wife?” The husbands has authority like Christ has authority. Christ uses his authority to serve his bride, which means that a husband can never use that authority to serve himself and please himself. You must use your authority to lead for the good of your wife.
• Romance your wife. Husbands, your wives are not trophies. For a lot of men, their wives are like a trophy that they display for everyone to see after all the hard work they have put to win it. Once they got the trophy, they just put it on a shelve. Men quit fighting for their wife once they got her. This is not right. Husbands, your wives are not trophies; she is your body for you to love and care for. That means you continue to pursue and romance her, especially after you are married. I can hear all the wives are shouting amen right now.

Second, lead spiritually. Ephesians 5:25-27 – Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, ²⁶ that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, ²⁷ so that he might present the church to himself in splendour, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. Husbands, nail this into your heart and mind. You are responsible to set the spiritual climate for your family. Ladies, this is why it’s very crucial for you to marry a Christ-loving man. Your husband will have a bigger influence than you on the outcome of your child’s spirituality. Survey shows that if daddy doesn’t go to church, then there is an 80% chance that your children won’t go to church. But if daddy goes to church, almost all the time the whole family goes to church.

Husbands, you are responsible to pursue your wives’ heart in the Lord. This is not the kind of romantic pursuing where you buy her flowers and take her to her favourite restaurants on date night. We got that covered on the earlier point. This is the kind of pursuing where you are required to dig deep into her heart and speak into her heart. This is the kind of pursuing where you reveal the sinfulness of her heart and help her to apply the gospel. Husbands, you are called to love your wives in such a way that increases the loveliness and the beauty of Christ in her. And this is not an easy thing to do. Have you ever tried to convince a girl that she is wrong? How did it go? Not well? I can imagine. But husbands, this is what we are called to do. We have a role to play in our wives’ transformation into Christlikeness. I think one of the most common mistakes we make as a Christian is that we see sin as a behavioural issue rather than a heart issue. It’s easy to take note of the behavioural issue and address them. But it won’t do much. Husbands, you are not called to point out your wife’s behavioural issue. It’s very easy to make lists of things of what they did wrong and make them aware of it. But you are called to sit and tend to their heart. Why is she acting this way? How’s her heart? Is there any bitterness or sinful motives that drive her behaviours? This requires us to pursue their hearts. And it’s not easy. Men, we are a terrible listener. We want them to tell us what is wrong in 5 minutes and we give them solutions to fix themselves. It does not work that way. It takes atleast an hour for them to get warm up and ready to talk, and another few hours for them to tell us what’s wrong. Husbands are to pursue their wives’ heart to increase the beauty of Christ in her.

Third, nourish cheerfully. Ephesians 5:28-30 – ²⁸ In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. ²⁹ For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, ³⁰ because we are members of his body. Husbands, you are not only called to love her sacrificially and lead her spiritually, you are also called to nourish her just like you would nourish your own body. With another word, you are called to provide for her needs. I’m not saying wives can’t work and provide for themselves. Nor am I saying that husbands need to make more money than wives. The Bible does not go there so each couple should have the freedom to work it out for themselves. But what I am saying is that men are designed to work and provide for his family.

From the very beginning, God commanded Adam to tend to the garden of Eden, to work. With another word, men, you are not created to sit on your couch and play games or watch sport all day; you are designed to work! It does not matter how much more money she makes compares to you. It’s in your DNA to work. And you work to provide for her. So stop being a stingy pain in the butt and start providing for her needs. Buy her the makeups she need to make herself pretty. If you are single and you are on a date, pay for her dinner. And do not use your parent’s money for it. You are the one who needs to provide for her, not your parents. If you don’t work and don’t have your own money, then don’t take her out. “What if my parents are rich?” We hate you but God loves you. But go work and make your own money first and then ask her out on a date. It takes real men to be in a relationship, not boys who drive BMW. Can I have amen girls? All the women love me right now and all the men hate me. Don’t worry ladies. Your turn to hate me is coming next week.

Distorted image

Husbands, God has given you responsibilities for you to flourish in your relationship with your wives. But because of sin, men are not living up to their responsibilities. Rather than following God’s design, Adam rebelled against it and ever since then, it’s in our DNA to rebel against God’s design. That’s why we are experiencing many pains and struggles in the relationship. All of us experiences struggle in a relationship because all of us are sinners. Sin causes us to look at a relationship through a distorted lens. Sin causes us to have a distorted image.

First, selfish love. Rather than loving sacrificially, sin has caused husbands to love selfishly. Husbands no longer look out for their wives’ best interest but husbands care more about their ego and satisfaction. Husbands use the authority God has given them to please themselves rather than to please their wives. This selfish love expresses itself in many different ways, but I want to focus on two of them for time’s sake.

• Physical and verbal abuse. I don’t care who you are, I don’t care what the situation is, I don’t care what she did to you, physical and verbal abuse are never acceptable. Husbands, when you physically or verbally abuse her, you dishonour her who is created in the image of God and at the same time, you dishonour God who created both of you in his image. If you are an abuser tonight, I want you to know that God is not pleased with you. He knows and he sees what you do to her and justice will be served. So, I want to make a plea to you tonight to stop. Tonight, God is graciously inviting you to repent and get help. Husbands, you are commanded to love your wives, not rule, and beat your wives. And ladies, if you are in an abusive relationship, get help. Don’t let shame stop you from reaching out for help. I had a very dear friend who was physically abused by her boyfriend for months and she was ashamed to reach out for help. Please, do not make the same mistake. God is gracious and he loves your boyfriend or husband, but he will not tolerate his daughter get trapped in an abusive relationship. In fact, it is because God is loving and gracious that the best thing you can do is get out of the relationship and seek help for him and let God deal with his wickedness before it is too late.
• Ladies, you need to know this. 9 out of 10 men struggle with some form of pornography at some point in their lives. They surveyed church attenders and found that more than 50% of guys who are active at church are addicted to porn. And this is not just single men issues. Many married men are addicted to porn as well. Guys, look at me, eye contact, I’m not dumb. I’m aware that a lot of you are struggling with porn even though you never told me about it. How do I know? In case you did not notice, I’m a male. I have the same urge as you. I understand your struggle. But look at me, don’t look down, eye contact. I love you and I need to tell you this. It doesn’t matter what your biology teacher taught you; it doesn’t matter what your doctor told you; it doesn’t matter what your friends and the culture are telling you; pornography is sinful because it both dishonour woman and God. You are using a woman to get what you want rather sacrificially loving them. God created you with a sex drive for a purpose, but that purpose is not for you to selfishly satisfy your sinful desire by dishonouring your own body, the woman around you and God who designed you.

Second, spiritual passivity. The term passivity simply means failing to pursue what God designed them to pursue. We can see this happening in the life of Adam. Do you know that the first sin committed is a sin of spiritual passivity? The first sin is not Eve eating the fruit but Adam’s failure to lead. When God created Adam and Eve, he gave a clear commandment to the man, not the woman. God commanded Adam to tend the garden of Eden. Eve was not around yet. Adam was the one who received the commandment. But when the serpent tempted his wife, Adam did nothing! It’s not like he was not around. Genesis 3 told us that Adam was with her. Yet he did nothing to prevent Eve from eating the fruit and in fact, he ate the fruit himself, despite knowing clearly what the Lord had commanded him. That’s passivity. It doesn’t end there. It gets worse. After they ate the fruit and rebelled against God, God went and look for them. But rather than owning his sin and take responsibility, he was hiding because he was afraid and ashamed. That’s passivity. And when God held Adam accountable, do you know what he did? He pointed his finger at the woman. Adam not only dodged his responsibility as the spiritual leader, but he also blamed his wife for what happened. That’s passivity. What Adam said was actually true. He wasn’t lying when he said that Eve was the one who gave him the fruit. But he neglected the fact that he was the one who received the commandment from God. And he was the one who was responsible to protect his wife.

Today, the husbands’ refusal to pursue God’s role is evident by the fact that there are more wives who loved the Lord than husbands. I’m not talking about male and female as I understand that there are more females than males in the world’s population. But the fact is there are more wives than husbands in the church. One example. I posted that I will preach on the gospel to the husbands on Instagram. And the first 15 likes all came from women. I thought, “Did I post the right poster? I am sure gospel to the wives is next week.” Women are more excited about the gospel to the husbands than men. What happens to the husbands? Where are they? They are the one that should be a spiritual leader at home, but they refused to worship God. And what we see as the result of it is many broken families. It’s not fair to put all the blame on husbands but we cannot neglect the fact that the weight of the responsibility lies on husbands. That’s why single ladies choose your man carefully. Your future husbands, whoever he is, will have a massive influence on you and your children walk with God. And again, I love you and that’s why I need to say this. If a man refuses to worship God and pursue his God-given responsibilities, then it’s best to stay away from him.

Third, laziness. I’ve said it again and again and I will keep on saying it. The weight of responsibility in making a relationship work lies on men. Yes, it takes two to tango and the women will need to play her part as well but it does not diminish the fact that men hold the greater weight of responsibility. That’s why we cannot have lazy men. Yet this is one of the effects of sin. Men are called to be the provider. Not just physically, but also spiritually and emotionally. You are required to work hard. You are not only working full time from 9 to 5, but you are also required to work overtime at home. That’s why one of the most destructive things you can do as a man is to spend most of your time in front of a TV playing your video games or watching Netflix and Sports Centre. Are they sinful? Of course not. But you are not primarily wired for that. You are designed to work; to take initiative; to provide. What happens if you happen to marry Bill Gate’s daughter? It doesn’t matter. It doesn’t take away your responsibility to work. A bored man is a very dangerous man. Sin is crouching at the door of a bored man, ready to eat you alive. Men, your energy is meant to be spent, not kept. So, go out there and be productive.

So, we learned the three responsibilities of husbands and the three ways sin has corrupted those responsibilities. The question is now, what are we supposed to do? Let me give you two applications in the light of what we learned and I’ll give one other application specifically for the single men.

Applications

First, behold the gospel. This goes back to the heartbeat of everything we believe. In order for us to be able to pursue our God-given responsibilities as husbands, it needs to begin by beholding the gospel. I cannot overstate this point. Husbands, you will never fully succeed in fulfilling God’s role for you. You will fail again and again. That’s why you need to behold the gospel. Because when you behold the good news of Jesus Christ, you will be reminded of what Christ has done for you. If you trust in Christ, what God sees in you is perfection. Do you hear that? Let me repeat myself. If you trust in Christ, what God sees in you is perfection. And since perfection is yours, now you are empowered by the Spirit to pursue your responsibilities.

Let me give you an example. I was introduced to porn at the age of 12. I stumbled upon porn magazine and it did not take long before my mind began to be consumed with dirty thoughts. My battle with lust began very early in life. Being raised in a church, I knew those things are sinful. So, I tried to fight it to the best of my abilities. I kept making a promise to God that I would not do it again, but I kept breaking my promise. I tried every sort of thing. I thought after getting baptised I would be free of porn. Not happening. I thought if some preacher anointed my head with oil, I would be free. Fail. I thought at the age of 16, when David was anointed as king, would be the age where I would be anointed with a superpower from God and break free from my addiction. Total failure. So, I was in this cycle of trying to break free with my willpower but keep failing and keep re-dedicating my life. Sounds familiar? Let me tell you what is the problem. I was trying to get rid of my sinful desire, without replacing it with another desire. And it was not working. To tell yourself to remove that sinful desire without replacing it with a greater desire is to lock yourself in a repetitive cycle. The only desire greater enough to remove that lustful desire in you is the desire for Christ. And this desire comes from knowing Christ’s love for you. Do you know how Christ has loved you? We often say that love is blind. But that’s immature love. Immature love refuses to see the flaws of the other person. But Christ’s love is a mature love. Mature love sees all the flaws and still choose to love in spite of it. That is how you are loved by Christ. He sees all your flaws. He sees all your ugliness, but he says, “I don’t care, I am going to cover it with my blood. I am going to give my life to make you beautiful.” Jesus sacrificially gives his life for you because he loves you. When you experience his love for you, you find the true satisfaction that few minutes of lust cannot give you. Christ is offering you infinite satisfaction and pleasures forevermore. It is only when you pursue Christ and his delight for you that the desire for sin began to wane in your life. No will power, no self-motivation can help you in your battle with sin. Only Christ and the infinite pleasure in him can set you free from your selfishness and enable you to love sacrificially. It is only when you love Jesus above all that you can love your wife sacrificially.

Second, be productive with your time and energy. Now that you know that God sees you as perfect, the Spirit empowers you to pursue godliness. Be intentional in removing those that take away your joy in Christ and be intentional in pursuing those that increase your joy in Christ. Get involved in the community. Join MC. Serve in the local church. Join RSI Bookclub. Lead your family in worship. Be intentional in pursuing your growth in godliness for yourself and your family. Don’t be lazy. Don’t waste your time doing unproductive things. Our natural tendency is to always look for comfort. But don’t. Men, you are designed to work. So, find something productive to spend your energy on. If you have extra time, use that time to work on your God-given responsibilities as a spiritual leader and provider.

Third, for single men. Initiate friendship with a godly woman. Note that I said friendship, not a relationship. There are lots of godly single women in RSI. In fact there are more godly women than men in RSI. So single men, seek their friendship. And may that godly friendship give birth to a godly marriage. The best marriage comes out of the best friendship. So, work on your friendship and begin to practice your God-given responsibilities as a man. And a quick tip for the single girls. Do not look for a man who is well versed in all their God-given responsibilities. Because you will find none. If you do find them, they are either happily married, or, he is single, 34 years old and a pastor. And there is only one of him and too many of you. Single girls, keep the bar high. But don’t seek perfection. Seek a man who is growing in his love for Christ. Use your words to encourage single men where they fall short. You must know what to expect from them if they pursue your hand in a relationship but use your word to encourage them to live up to the standard God has set for them. Ladies, your words are extremely powerful. It can either build an under-qualified men to be men after God’s own heart, or, it can destroy the best of men to dust. Choose your words carefully. More on that next week.

Let me close with a quote from Tony Evans. “As goes the man, so goes the family. As goes the family, so goes the church. As goes the church, so goes the community. As goes the community, so goes the nation. So, if you want to change the nation, change the community. If you want to change the community, change the church. If you want to change the church, change the family. If you want to change the family, change the man.” Men, your love for the gospel and your wives can change the nation.

Discussion questions:

1. Men, before the sermon, what mark would you give yourself as to your readiness to fulfill your responsibilities as husbands? (1 for not ready and 5 for I am very close to be the best husband ever). Explain your reason behind the mark.
2. Out of the four images of loving sacrificially, which is one is the hardest for you? Why?
3. What does it mean for husbands to be a spiritual leader? What can men do to grow in this role?
4. What is selfish love? Can you give some other examples beside the two that are already mentioned?
5. Women, why is it extremely crucial for you to have high Biblical standards in choosing a spouse?
6. How does the gospel empower men to live out their God-given responsibilities in a relationship?
7. Men, after the sermon, what mark would you give yourself as to your readiness to fulfill your responsibilities as husbands? (1 for not ready and 5 for I am almost fully Christ-like). Explain your reason behind the mark.